Tuesday, April 21, 2009

a special little story

I GOT THIS STORY IN MY EMAIL AND I WANTED TO SHARE IT WITH YOU GUYS.


"Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room.

One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room's only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back.

The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon, when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window. The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.

The window overlooked a park with a lovely lake and mountains in the background. A boat floated in the water and beautiful houses lined the shores. There were flowers and trees, lovers strolling arm in arm and people walking their dogs.



As the man by the window described all this in exquisite details, the man on the other side of the room would close his eyes and imagine the picturesque scene.

Once the man by the window described a parade passing by. Although the other man could not hear the band - he could see it in his mind's eye as the gentleman by the window portrayed it with descriptive words.



Time passed.

One morning, the day nurse arrived to bring water for their baths only to find the lifeless body of the man by the window, who had died peacefully in his sleep. She was saddened and called the hospital attendants to take the body away.

As soon as it seemed appropriate, the other man asked if he could be moved next to the window. The nurse was happy to make the switch, and after making sure he was comfortable, she left him alone. Slowly, painfully, he propped himself up on one elbow to take his first look at the real world outside. He strained to slowly turn to look out the window besides the bed.

It faced a blank wall.



The man asked the nurse what could have compelled his deceased roommate to describe such wonderful things outside the window. The nurse responded that the man was blind and could not even see the wall.

She said, 'Perhaps he just wanted to encourage you.



There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations.
Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.
If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.
Today is a gift; that is why it is called 'the Present.'
"

Saturday, April 11, 2009

this too will pass

Earlier i wrote about how stressed out i was. I was lacking faith. I went to church and it made me feel alot better. It put me back on track. This is what i left with.

*FEED YOUR FAITH && STARVE YOUR DOUBTS
*FEAR TOLERATED IS FAITH CONTAMINATED
*I RECOGNIZE THAT TESTS COME IN LIFE BUT GOD IS FAITHFUL... 1 CORINTHIANS 10:13
*EVERY TRIAL HAS AN EXPIRATION DATE
*GOD WILL PROVIDE THE RIGHT OPPORTUNITY WHEN THE TIME IS RIGHT

take it how you want. i dont wanna explain it because i kno what it means to me. Now im feeling like a winner because I am winning. My heart is fixed I trust God. My stripes are healed. :)

big ole cry baby

NO FAITH,,,
NO STRENGTH,,,
LOWER THAN LOW,,,

I don't understand how my life got to the place its at. I'm always mad, upset, discontent. I'm disconnected fom myself. I keep fuckin crying and its pissing me off. I cried yesterday on the bus on the train while I was walking. I woke up this morning crying and haven't stopped since. I'm a big fuckin crybaby. I hate the life I'm living. I wish there was a fast forward button. Its stressful. I try to have faith but I'm losing it. Optimism is not working. A million interviews and another apartment lost. I'm gonna be 21 with nothing. Frustrated!!! This isn't the life I planned. I honestly didn't see it coming. I miss my old life. I miss school, I miss working, I miss independence. I miss being tired from days with not enough hours. I miss being to bizzy for myself. Now I'm just sick and tired. Where did I go.